Photo Credit: Silo Studios
Divine Timing
On the day of a previously scheduled photo shoot (pictures above), my son Zaire was approached and yelled at by a white man who deemed it his responsibility to “check” my son about his Black Lives Matter mask while he was working, because apparently “all lives matter” insert eye roll. He tried to steal Zaire’s Joy, but he lost, Zaire won!
A little context…
This was only his third day on the job, a job he begged me to allow him to get. This summer was going to be a busy one for Zaire. He had planned to pick up a few college courses to jump start his sophomore year, as well as participate in video classses that he has been taking for the last four years. However, the Coronavirus pandemic had other plans for how everyone would be living their lives in 2020. Everything was cancelled! So like the responsible motivated young man that I raised him to be, Zaire was looking for something to do to fill his time. You see I grew up fast. I started working at an early age to help my my mother make ends meet, but this was not my son’s story. He’s an only child and I can afford to buy him everything that he needs and most of the things he wants. Now don’t get me wrong I am not rich by any means and we still live in the hood (And We Love It!), but I never wanted the hardship of the hood to steal his Black Boy Joy. It has always been a priority for me to make sure that my son is taken care of and knows that he is loved, because I have seen first hand the adverse effect the world has on Black Boys who do not have or get what they need; emotionally, mentally, and financially.
Back to the story…
This fragile person screamed at My Son that all lives matter and when his privilege didn’t get him the reaction I assume he was looking for, he walked off. During the confrontation Zaire stared at him like he was an idiot and remained calm. He didn’t utter one word to this man, because as Zaire said “he wasn’t worth my time.” A co-worker came over and helped to fend off this man who had clearly lost his damn mind. Zaire was brought home by his father who picked him up that day, and they both told me about the incident. I was FURIOUS! I was enraged and hurting for my child who I protect with everything in me, and at that moment I wasn’t there. In this moment I even broke my phone because of how ANGRY I was. That Karma came back quick. Haha! I guess for the horrible thoughts I was having at that moment. Believe me, they were horrible thoughts. My Momma Bear instincts kicked in and I just wanted to hold and protect him. I burned some sage then sat and talked to Zaire about white fragility and how nothing that that man said should ever pierce his self confidence. I called his job and explained what happened. Why did I call? Because my son being the cool headed joyful young man that I raised him to be didn’t even report the incident to management. His manager was shocked and apologized that this happened and said they would talk to employees about what to do in a situation like this. They were great! Through all of this we got dressed and continued with our plans to do the photoshoot.
On our way to the photo shoot it started raining, but we STILL continued with our plans. We were greeted at my favorite place, the Central Terminal by two of my favorite Souls Molly the owner of Silo Studios and her husband Jimmy. Quick back story…. the three of us worked together at a television news station and now Molly and I work together for a New York State Senator. Divine Timing! I told them what happened and they were very supportive and reassured Zaire of his right to be seen. I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe that Zaire needed to see hatred that day so that he could also see how beautiful he is. It was destined for his Joy to be captured that day.
It was destined that nothing got in the way of our plans that day. You see Black Boys in America have always had to feel that they have no right to JOY. But I will tell you this, My Son is JOY! He has been raised with love free of trauma. We needed that photo shoot that day. It revealed the mother bear in me and the joy in Zaire.
Thank you Molly & Jimmy for making Zaire smile and laugh at a time when he was flooded with emotions of pain, anger, and self doubt. Thank you for seeing him for exactly who he is. You truly captured his Black Boy Joy in these photos and I am forever grateful.
Zen Culture 